Why You’re Setting Yourself Up To Fail On Your Weight Loss Journey, A Full Face Of Contour and Resting Judgy Face
You. Are. Notttt proclaiming your undying love for the man of yo’ dreams that you met two weeks ago (again)??
Your dog’s not even that cute
Neither are your kids.
What with your curly blow, full face of contour and strategic side boob on show in your cheap Ann Summer’s silks? … Off Ya F*ck, Hun.
That’ll never last..
OMFG. …A Puppy that does a John Travolta impression??
I gotta get me one’a THOSE.
Ok let’s Google Dancing John Travolta Puppy.
Now up until recently THIS was how I was setting up my day.
My little, all be it slightly up turned, button nose in everyone else’s shit.
(And before you say it, I already know what a non-judgmental joy I am to be around, so don’t worry yo’ little self, Hun)
I mean, do I really give a shit what Sandra (who came to my spinning class 1 time, eight years ago) is having for her lunch?
No I don’t.
Is a dancing dog REALLY contributing to my day?
No it’s not.
Nor is the guy I went to primary school with who is embarrassingly indiscreet about ALL THE SEX and all the out of this world INSANO fun that he’s 100% DEFINITELY having, with his new rebound bird.
I mean, c’mooooon, if you’ve gotta force it, it’s probably shit…
And also probably for the benefit of your ex…
Just a guess.
Anyhooo, like I said … Joy to be around.
So what’s my point in all this?
Now ya know how many times I see this…
“You’re eating Wheet-a-Bix for breakfast Sandra? You’re going to hell”
Followed by a smug…
“MYYYYYY personal trainer says that you should be eating a PROTEIN based breakfast for optimal results”
(even though I don’t actually know what optimal results look like, since I’ve looked exactly the same as I did when I started training with MYYYYYYYYY personal trainer twelve months ago and have to eat my breakfast of stewing steak holding my nose)
I mean, nothing gives you a ‘breakfast complex’ like advice from some passive aggressive, Carpet Carrying Avenger who looks like he eats a full baby cow for breakfast whilst staring in to the eyes of it’s mother.
Yes TEXT BOOK says a protein based breakfast will keep you satiated till lunch time.
But guess what, it doesn’t work for everyone.
And I have a confession…
I don’t eat a protein based breakfast.
(Yes, I know, I’m going to hell with Sandra)
And neither do some of my clients.
And here’s where a lot of the FB- PT- Text Book Gurus get it wrong.
You think eating a few scrambled eggs for breakfast is gunna change your life and turn ya in to Megan Fox?
I mean, if it works for ya..
You get down witcha bad ‘scrambled egged’ self.
But for most women I work with
(the ones that have kids, jobs and social lives..
Like REAL ACTUAL women- probs just like you)
… need to look further than the breakfast part and take stock of what’s going in in THEIR whole morning..
I’ll have you consider that’s exactly what sets you up for the day..
Is the first thing you’re doing in the morning reaching for your phone from under the pillow and reading everyone else’s negative bullshit. The same bullshit that can put you in a bad mood just from the read of a certain person’s status?
Is Facebook also the last thing you’re seeing at night before you go to sleep?
Do you snooze your alarm 8 times before you drag your tired arse outta bed then survive the first part on coffee to function?
Do you run round after your kids, as soon as your eyes open in a mad panic to get everyone where they need to be on time?
Do you then skip breakfast entirely?
Do you make a conscious effort to take some time for yourself?
To compose yourself?
Even if it’s just five minutes?
To wake up and get fresh straight outta bed?
I’m not talking jumping in a cold shower followed by some yoga and three hours of meditation… because REALLY?
That’s something that 20 year old, newly qualified PT’s with no kids, who still live at home with their mum and dad, say…
Only to stress you out with guilt and feeling of inadequacy because THAT SHIT just isn’t realistic for most REAL LIFE women.
I mean, while we’re at it, waking up next to Tom hardy would be great too, right?!
I’ll have you consider that the way you set yourself up in a morning can set you up for your WHOLE day.
I’ll also have you consider that the outcome of your day can be determined by your morning routine.
You’re knackered from scrolling FB till late, so you snooze your alarm then have five minutes on FB where you see a passive aggressive status from that annoying knob head at work which immediately puts you in a bad mood.
You’re short with your kids ‘cause you’re grumpy, feel gross cause you have’t left enough time for a proper shower..
kids get to school JUST on time but you’re late because in the haze you forgot your laptop. At work you bump in to the knob head which reminds you of his arrogant pig status.. again bad mood.
You’re so knackered from all the rush and stress from work that you could have dealt with fine if you could just get your stupid self up out of bed and didn’t spend too long on FB at night, so you now skip the gym and have a comfort food tea and an obligatory few glasses of wine to ease the stress and make you feel better… and you’ll try and be better tomorrow (again)
Now with the gals on my SOS programme this is the EXACT stuff we work on, along with nutrition and training, to get to the ACTUAL bottom of why you’re STUCK and the ACTUAL things that are hindering your progress and in reality it’s probably not what ya thought it was.
I ask the questions then WE, together, plan it out and do the work.
If ya need a push in the right direction ya can apply for SOS here until the 20th March when the doors close…
Love Char ‘Judgy Mc Judgy Pants’ De Curtis
PS, If you’re reading this on my mailing list I’ve got a really special invitation for ya coming this week of how ya can join my tribe for free